Self Compassion

I hope I am not being too mushy in my posts, but I wanted to share something I just read because I can't stop thinking about it.   A few days ago I was doing some research for work- reading some articles about habits and how to break them.  There was an article about how we fall back on old habits so easily.  Part of it is physical because we make neurological pathways within our brain and those  habits over time carve a pathway.   Our brain likes simplicity and our brain likes what it knows so it follows those already made paths.    


The article was interesting enough, if you want to read it here it is.  But the last thing the author of the article said regarding habits was, The best path forward is self-compassion.  For some reason this was bold in my mind.  

I said the words, self-compassion over and over and I haven't stopped thinking of that.  I grew up being taught to love and serve others.  I try to teach my children that.  It is an important concept to get outside our own self and see the needs of others.   But how much do we hear or learn about loving ourselves.  What does that even mean?  I think it can mean different things for different people.  For me I have to work on the negative self talk  I have when I screw up,  have too much time on my hands or feel overwhelmed...well really anytime, I need to work on it.    It hit me this morning when my son was grumbling to himself because he put honey on his toast before he put the butter on (oh the tragedy).  I heard him grumble the words, "you're so stupid" talking to himself.  We had a conversation about that, and I threw in there the need for him to be kind to himself.  It is so easy to beat ourselves up.  I do it all the time because I know all my faults, mistakes etc.. but I also don't give myself enough credit and I can bet you don't either.  

We need to create neurological pathways in our brain so that self-compassion is a habit and a simple path the brain will want to take.  How do we do that, repetition.   So I challenge you for the next few days, weeks, months, and years- figure out a healthy way to treat yourself with self-compassion (if you need to throw chocolate in the mix, I get it) .  When your faults seem totally blatant and you are having a bad day remember self-compassion!